


I Was Never Normal Was I?

by HeadphoneArcheologist



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe, And Rose likes to break things, Dave has a skatebaord, God Tier, High School, Humanstuck, Jade is Lonely, John is sort of Awkward, M/M, sort of i guess
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-30
Updated: 2013-08-06
Packaged: 2017-12-13 04:47:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/820142
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeadphoneArcheologist/pseuds/HeadphoneArcheologist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John Egbert is Thirteen years old and has lived his whole life indoors; and his entire life he thought this was perfectly normal. That was before he met Dave, before he started to see the cracks in this perfect fantasy. Before John Egbert fell in love with more than his best friend, but the world outside.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prolouge: John Introduce Yourself

**Author's Note:**

> Alternate Title of this Chapter - ;B
> 
> That winky face, i wonder how many times it makes an appearance in this chapter.  
> But that's beside the point.  
> No the point is this fic, it's awesome. At least I think so. I have been super excited working on this and I am REALLY excited to finally post it! I really hope ya'll enjoy reading as much as I have writing. 
> 
> Keep in mind this is only part one of a four part prologue. All four parts are done but I'm not going to post them all right away; sorry. ;B
> 
> Also there will be other relationships in this story but John/Dave will be the focus. I'll post the others as they appear. Also, i will probably update the tags along the way too.
> 
> Please feel free to leave a comment with predictions, praise, suggestions, or anything and I will do my best to reply promptly.

**==== > John: Introduce Yourself**

Your name is John Egbert.

You are thirteen years old.

And in that entire time you have never once been outside.

It's okay though! Because it is all perfectly normal! Your dad tells you all the time that no one goes outside so it’s perfectly normal for you to be in here all the time. It is all perfectly normal, YOU are perfectly normal. You just have to ignore how impossible it sounds, like you ignore that he obviously goes out there sometimes. 

You don't think about where the food you eat comes from. You don't think about where he disappears to sometimes, the house is pretty big but you've had times when you looked everywhere for him and still never found him. You don't think about the voices you hear when the wind carried just right; voices that could only come from outside. You do not think about the dim glow of the city at night. You just do not think about it. You would drive yourself mad if you did.

Besides, your dad would never lie to you! Yeah maybe he bakes way too many cakes and maybe he pranks you sometimes in the night but he loves you! He would never lie, would he? No he wouldn't, no way not even going to think about it. Totally and completely impossible.

Isn't it? It totally is.

**==== > John: Be bored**

You lean against one of many window sills in your home. Your head propped up by one hand, the other moving back and forth with the breeze as you use your windy powers to keep a leaf in the air. You have always been able to manipulate the wind, it just came naturally to you. These days you mostly just play with leaves and cause soft breezes; at least not after your dad yelled at you for causing that tornado. Oops. You are so not sorry.

A soft sigh escapes your lips and mingles with the air outside. You let the leaf fall the tall expanse of your home which happens to be a tall tower. You are not entirely sure if your dad has always lived here but you certainly have. 

When you look down all you see is green and if you look a little further out you can see the green blue of the water. You think back to when the windows were all covered up, it made the house dark and depressing. Not to mention it cut you off from your element which was the wind. Your dad only ever opened the windows when you promised him you would never go outside. You have to admit, it looks so wonderful out there but your dad says it’s dangerous, not to mention you promised.

You'll never tell your dad but some day you think about what it would be like out there, to just walk and feel the grass beneath your feet, to taste the salty air without hanging your head out the window. You want to run up and down the hills you see, you want to watch the wind rustle the trees from a ground view. You want to see everything from a new perspective.

When your dads PDA (which is sitting forgotten on the window sill by your elbow) makes a noise you nearly jump out of your skin. Oh yeah you forgot you were pestering Dave. (Your dad didn't know you talked to him, or even that you had his PDA. You had made up some bullshit excuse that you tossed it out the window with your windy powers by accident. This was half true because you did toss it out the window, but never let it fall before causing it drift slowly back up to you heheheheheh :B)

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB]

TG: john are you still there  
TG: jooooooooooooohn  
TG: dont ignore me  
TG: your breaking my heart here bro  
EB: sorry dave!  
EB: i can only take so much of your rapping.  
TG: my sick beats are fucking awesome and you know it  
EB: sure they are dave.  
EB: ;B  
TG: john did you really just do that  
TG: dont you winky face at me mister  
EB: heheheheheheh ;B

Wow you forgot how much you love pestering Dave. Your dad would probably kill you if he ever found out but you were just so lonely up here by yourself. When you first talked to him it was sort of weird but you were getting better at this whole human communication thing. At first you said a lot of weird things but who could blame you? The only other person you had ever talked to was your dad!

You first met Dave when you were like ten and it was one some stupid website you were on that one day you went into your fathers study and used his computer without permission. You have been best bros ever since. 

(You don't think too hard when he mentions things that sound a lot like he goes outside just like you ignore the way your stomach flip flops when he pesters you.)

distantly you hear your dad calling for you and you nearly drop the PDA. When you manage to get a hold of it you quickly reply to Dave, ignoring the tangent he had gone off on. Dave did that a lot so you were used to it and you found it oddly endearing because it was so like him. (You often wonder if he does it in real life. You image he does when you fantasize what his voice might sound like.)

EB: sorry dave my dad is calling me.  
EB: so i gotta go.  
EB: try not to be too bored without me!  
EB: ;B

You don't have time to read his reply before you are pocketing the device and running down the hall to find your dad, yelling; "I'm in here!" At the door way you paused momentarily to turn back and gaze longingly outside. You wondered what it would be like to fly, to be outside. To be free. You shake your head and run off to find out what your dad wants.

**==== > Remember**

In your memory little five year old John is standing by the open window you had been standing at in the present time. Although he stands on his tip toes in order to peer out of the glass. Without meaning to, little John has manipulated the wind just right that voices carry softly from the city over the hills. The one that five year old John can see the lights of at night if he looks hard enough. 

He looks around trying to see if there is anyone outside which he knows is impossible but he looks anyway. All he can see are trees and a few birds. No people, so then who do those voices belong to? It couldn't be the birds right? There had to be people down there, people he couldn't see.

Five year old John looks confused because his dad told him that people didn't go outside, and you still believe that. Little five year old John goes to find his Dad who would never lie to him in the kitchen making cake. He was always making cake. "Dad" he asks softly, innocently. 

Dad Egbert turns around and looks at his young son. "Hello John" he greets pleasantly, clad in his usual baking attire and fedora hat. Minus the pipe this time however.

"Why are there voices outside?" Little John asks. 

At this Dad Egbert stops what he is doing and takes off the plain white apron he was wearing before kneeling to eye level with little john. He places a hand on his sons shoulder and smiles softly. "What voices?" he asks, sounding genuinely confused.

Little five year old John points toward the window he had just walked from and says; "I heard voices outside... There shouldn't be voices right? You said no one ever went outside..." his voice trails off as he looks expectantly at his dad. Waiting for an explanation to put his mind and curiosity at rest.

For a moment Dad Egbert looks thoughtful before carefully lifting little John up and carrying him to the window. Little John holds onto his dads clean white shirt and looks outside, listening, but this time he doesn't hear anything. Dad Egbert looks at his son and smiles softly "I don't hear anything."

"B-but I really heard something!" John protests even as his dad sets him down, trailing after the man as he heads back into the kitchen before anything burns. Little John pouts the same way you do today, buckteeth painfully visible and lower lip obvious. His young bright blue eyes gazed up at his father with trust, who looked back down at him with love and something else that looked sad.

"It must have been your imagination" was the only excuse his father could give at the time. Five year old John let it drop reluctantly. That of course did not stop him and you from listening though. From that day on you had listened carefully to the wind but only seldom heard the voices again. You never really thought about where they might come from, just that they are a mystery you wish you could solve.

**==== >**

The memory is cut off suddenly because your present dad just asked present John to help him with the cake. Gross, you fucking hate cake. 

So you probably should have seen the cream pie prank coming when you entered the kitchen. You think in this situation Dave would say simply;

_Irony_

-

Next Chapter ====> John: Be Dave


	2. Prologue: Dave Introduce Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave Strider is Thirteen years old. He is the embodiment of cool, he breaths cool. Even when the other kids don't know all he is capable of, he is still one cool motherfucker. Now if only he could be that cool level headed kid when he was really needed. Dave Strider is no hero, but he is whiling to give it a shot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow one hundred hits already? Jesus Christ you guys are fucking crazy. Not that I am complaining, no siree, you guys keep on being crazy. Then we can be friends.
> 
> Part two of the four part prologue is complete! This one is of course about Dave and the next will focus on Rose.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I have this fairly permanent mindset about how Dave is going to behave in this fic and i hope I do him and his Brother Justice. Since I first started writing 'I Always Knew Something Was Missing' (my other fic) I have been getting better at portraying the alpha kids, at last I think so, so hopefully Dirk and the others will be less OOC in this fic.
> 
> Thanks for reading and don't forget to comment!

Your name is Dave Strider.

You are Thirteen years old.

And you are no hero, but dammit it all if you are not going to try.

Your entire life has been in the care of one Dirk Strider, or Bro as you call him. He has taught you everything you know about cool, irony, how to fight and how to survive. He also explained to you when you were really young that you are not normal and you never will be.

Even overlooking the fact that your eyes are blood red (by far not a normal colour) and that you know more about swords and fighting than ordinary kids, you are still far from being and one of those ordinary kids. It is as natural to you as breathing really and sometimes you do it by accident. So what if you could make time speed up or slow down when you want? You never thought that makes you strange but other kids can't do it so you let Bro convince you that yeah, it is in fact extraordinary.

So of course Bro gave you a short lecture on not fucking with time while other people could see you. What could you say? The world just isn't ready for this kind of awesome. You don't mind one bit keeping it secret.

Besides, it wasn't as if you were the only one who could do this sort of thing. Nah, Jade are Rose are just as 'normal' as you are. 

**==== > Dave: Be Cool and Update SB&HJ**

Well you could be a responsible person and update your sweet webcomic, or you could do something productive like your homework which is due in the morning. In fact you were about to do just that (the first thing, not homework) when your best bro starts to pester you. This is kind of weird seeing as how it's like 12:34 AM. Egbert usually isn't awake this early. So of course, being the concerned friend you are, you open the window to see whats up.

ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

EB: hey dave?  
EB: are you awake?  
TG: i am  
TG: the fuck are you doing up  
TG: dont you have like a lame ass curfew or something  
EB: heheh yeah...  
TG: care to share with the class whats going on in that dorky head of yours egbert  
EB: i couldn't sleep.  
TG: is nightmare shit or insomnia  
EB: insomnia i guess.  
EB: i just cant stop thinking about... stuff.  
EB: its really annoying.  
TG: stuff huh sounds ominous  
EB: it totally isn't.  
EB: what are you doing up so late anyway?  
TG: cool kids dont need sleep  
EB: haha now if only you were cool dave.  
EB: then you would never have to sleep.  
EB: like a cool kid.  
EB: which you totally aren't.  
TG: egbert did you really just say that  
TG: im offended  
EB: don't worry im kidding!  
EB: you're the coolest guy i know dave!  
EB: then again i don't know many people heheh.  


Conversation flows naturally between the two of you after that. John manages to stay awake and talk to you for a few more hours. Then hes falling asleep at his computer and you manage to nag your best friend into going to sleep. (TG: growing egderps need their sleep) (EB: omg dave stop being a mother hen! - EB: i'll go to sleep are you happy now?) (TG: yes)

**==== > Dave: Remember**

You remember when you were like five and you met Rose and Jade for the first time. Bro, your guardian, is best friends with Jake English (Jades grandpa) and Roxy Lalonde (Roses mother) so it was obvious the three of you would grow up together. He also knows this rad chick named Jane Crocker. You still have no idea how he made friends with so many old folks but you aren't judging. 

In this memory you can see little five year old Dave chilling with little six year old Jade and Five year old Rose. His first impression of Jade is that she's a cool girl, a little hyperactive but cute and hells of a lot of fun; Rose seems cool too, she's really smart. (after this meeting both Roxy and Bro have been obnoxious with how similar the two of you look. Really its annoying. They joke sometimes about the two of you being siblings which is total bullshit.) 

Despite how close you Jade and Rose are in the future, this isn't the part of the memory that is important. No that part happens when Bro pulls Little Dave aside and kneels in front of him, sheds his shades and gives his younger bro a serious look. 

"Listen up lil' man" he starts off. Little Dave is feeling a bit anxious seeing his brother behave so seriously when all he is used to is the Bro who is sarcastic, cool, and never acts like a mature adult. "Those two sweet gals in there" he gestures vaguely in the direction of Rose and Jade, whom little Dave can still see. His red eyes turn back toward Bro who continues. "You gotta look out for 'em you hear? They're like you, they ain't normal girls." 

Five year old Dave lets this sink in a bit. Bro has always told him that he wasn't normal, he also told him that it didn't make him a freak; It only made him that much cooler. This was the first time that Bro has ever told him the cost of being extraordinary. "When you grow up, and you ain't so little, life's gonna get rough for ya kids and as the Strider of this group its yer job to watch their backs." 

Little Dave doesn't get it, not really. He thinks he does, but he won't really understand for at least ten more years. None the less he nods because his Bro taught him to never back down from a challenge. Not to mention this was a responsibility of a Strider, and as a Strider he was not going to let his big brother down. 

"Sure Bro." 

Bro stands up and smirks, slipping his shades back on so he looks like the Bro Dave has always remembered. He holds out a fist and little Dave bumps it with his own smaller fist. A silent agreement was made that day between you and your brother. You are going to protect the girls, they are your responsibility. 

**==== >**

Before you start to think about the darker aspects of that promise to your bro (a promise you worry you might not be able to keep) Rose pesters you.

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

TT: David stop thinking.  
TT: While it is an activity you rarely partake upon, and I am proud you are once again trying to use your brain matter, I must ask that you cease and return to the not thinking days of past Dave.  
TG: what  
TT: You know exactly what i am speaking of.  
TT: You were just about to start considering something that would get your metaphorical panties in a bunch.  
TT: I am here to metaphorically untwist said panties.  
TG: dammit rose stop using your freaky mind powers on me  
TG: and your metaphors suck  
TT: I am merely trying to spare you some pointless heartache.  
TT: You should be thanking me.  
TT: However i know better than to hope for a thanks from my almost brother.  
TG: fuck you rose  
TG: now you sound like your mother  
TT: Did I?  
TT: Forgive me.  
TT: I need to go vomit now.

You roll your eyes at your 'sister' you knew how much she hated being compared to her mom. They had this whole passive aggressive war going on that you did not want a part of. Still it was kind of fun to watch her squirm, not to mention she deserved it after she used her damn seer powers to violate the privacy of your future again. Thank the Ironic Gods she can't read minds.

At least she managed to keep you from thinking about _that_.

You yourself could always go and check up on future you but it was seven hells of complicated. You tried to avoid fucking with the timeline if at all possible and stick to the mere slowing down or speeding up of said timeline. Time travel was too much of a pain.

-

Next Chapter ====> Dave: Be Rose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again i want to thank ya'll for reading, it's really sweet of you guys.
> 
> (also the saying 'Seven Hells of Complicated' is actually something i say a lot and figured it fit Dave pretty damn well.)
> 
> -Headphone Archeologist


	3. Prologue: Rose Introduce Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose Lalonde is thirteen years old and lives with her drunk of a mother, Roxy Lalonde, so she has always taken care of herself and on several occasions her mother. She is a genius with short blond hair wrapped up in psychoanalysis. Rose has always been calm, mature and independent but sometimes she really just wants to break things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup readers just got a few things to say.  
> First and foremost, hi and thanks for reading! 
> 
> Second most, I am traveling to Cambridge Massachusetts next week, I dunno how this will effect my ability to post but I am going to be Reaaaaaaaallly busy that week. I will defiantly post the final part to the prologue but I dunno when I'll get around to posting the first official chapter so it might be late.
> 
> Sorry guys.

Your name is Rose Lalonde. 

You are currently thirteen years of age.

And sometimes you just really want to hurt someone.

Of course being interested in psychology as you are, this fact worries you quite a bit and very often. None the less you can't seem to stop it. You are a calm collected, mature young lady and despite all this sometimes deep deep down you just really want to break everything in sight, running down anyone who tried and fails to stop you; and sometimes in the darkest part of the night you entertain the thought and try to image what it would be like.

It is horribly wonderful. 

You grew up in the care of your darling drunken mother, Roxy Lalonde and sometimes you hate being related to her. Since you were a mere child you have been not only looking out for yourself but her as well. You could not count the number of times you had to nurse her after a hangover.

(You suppose this is probably the source of your destructive tendencies.)

Despite all of your tender love and care, you never worried about her. No, that was because you always knew exactly what time she would come home and in what state. You usually had everything she would need ready for here moments before she burst in. It was a talent of yours, a gift shall you say. 

You were a seer, which is funny because you don't really 'see' anything. It is more like a feeling, like something you already knew and had forgotten. None the less you are more aware of the future than others and you can predict when things will happen and what can be done to avoid or accelerate certain events. 

For the most part you let time flow on its own, still, there are occasions where you felt the need to intervene.

At first this used to scare you and for a while you brushed it off as déjà vu . However as time went on it became more and more clear that these feelings were real and you were in fact predicting the future. You never talked to anyone about it, not really, Jade and Dave know of course, they are your friends, and you believe your mother is aware even if she never brings it up. It is not that you mind having few people to discuss this with, it is a mere observation. 

After all it can be difficult to confide in others while also refusing to reveal the future. You only direct people to ensure the best outcome. You never tell them what is going to happen. No, because by telling someone their future you would be in fact changing it and it then becomes unpredictable.

**==== > Rose: Psychoanalyze David Strider**

You suppose you could do this, he has after all been flooding your inbox with message after message. He appears to be rapping something about apples, you are not very sure. His raps tend to be confusing. Of course the fact that he is rapping at you at all is a sign that he is desperate for human communication. What can you say, you know him too well.

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

TT: Good evening David.  
TG: fuck off lalonde  
TG: i dont need you psychoanalyzing my brain right now  
TT: Really because your miles and miles of your attempts at rapping is saying other wise.  
TT: Do you know what those raps are saying David?  
TT: They are saying 'I am desperate for human communication Rose take pity on me.'  
TG: fuck you rose  
TG: the only thing my raps say is how awesome i am  
TT: That was weak even by your standards Dave.  
TG: shut up  
TG: why are we friends again  
TG: no dont it was a rhetorical question  
TT: All the pointless banter aside, is there any particular reason you pestered me today?  
TG: i cant even fucking remember  
TT: Obviously it is because you value my opinions and crave my companionship.  
TG: obviously  
TT: Now now Dave, are you being sarcastic?  
TG: was i  
TG: hadnt noticed  
TT: Of course, must have been my mistake.

A small smile makes its way onto your face. Despite being a seer and being the one your friends always come to for help, you feel like they end up helping you so much more. You hate to think of how crazy you might have already gone without them. You always thought psychology might help you understand your own feelings, you find it has yet to.

For a moment you ignore Strider and turn to look at a pile of unfinished knitting you had been working on. With another look to the screen you take the pile into your lap and start working where you left off, watching with amusement as Dave continues the conversation on his own. You hardly even need to input anything so you allow your mind to wander.

**==== > Rose: Remember**

There is a small five and a half year old Rose in your memory. She is sleeping soundly in her purple bedroom. The house is quiet because she is the only one in it, and she will admit to herself and herself alone that this frightens her a bit. However she is smart, rational and bar far too intelligent to be afraid of the dark.

But she is also only five and a half years old.

Early in the morning, during one of those rare moments where Rose is almost awake but not entierly, does her mother come home. The house instantly fills with noises as doors are thrown open only to clash into walls recklessly. Drunken laughter bounces along walls and glass shatters against hard wood floors. In another moment there is the distinct sound of a body landing roughly onto the living room couch. Younger Rose however has already seen this, so she knows exactly the moment she needs to get up and check on her dearest mother.

Clad in a white satin sleeping gown Young Rose walks into the living room, watching her mother giggle to herself, trying to drink from a bottle that has long since been empty. "Mom" Young Rose starts "you were out late again."

Of course Roxy is far too drunk to notice much of what she is saying. Young Rose sighs and heads into the kitchen, moving a table chair to allow her to access the sink she fills a glass with water and drags that same chair into the bathroom so she can reach the bottle of medicine her mother will surely need in the morning.

This task accomplished she returned to the living room to hand her mother the glass. Roxy downs the contents, pulling a face that would suggest she is disappointed with the lack of alcohol. Roxy grins slow and lazy, pulling her daughter onto the couch with her, surprising the girl who lets out a small "EEP!" 

"yur sush a gud girl... always taken care uf meh." Roxy slurs drunkenly. Young Rose pulls herself out of her mothers grip and heads back to her room, but she does not go back to sleep. Instead she sits on her bed and waits. She has seen this too, so she knows exactly when to go back out there, (she counts the seconds silently in her head until the proper time has passed) knowing her mother is now asleep so she can drape a blanket over her sleeping parent. 

Young Rose starts to head back to her room when she looks down at the sleeping form of her mother. In the dark suddenly her room seems twice as scary. Instead she climbs onto the couch with her mom. There is not much room however the Younger Lalonde manages to fit herself onto the cushions and underneath the blanket.

Roxy sighs contently in her sleep and cuddles her daughter close. Young Rose rolls her eyes but deep down in glad for the embrace. 

Those were the nights you miss, the nights where you slept without dreaming of futures or nightmares of blood and pain with you at the center. Sometimes you really just want to hurt people, and you entertain this thought at night in your dreams. Five and a Half year old Rose did not deal with these problems. Rather she worried about her mother.

These days you find it harder and harder to care.

**==== >**

You snap out of this pointless flashback when you get a feeling deep in your chest. It aches dully and you recognize the feeling. Following is the sensation of recognition. Almost as if you have been trying to solve a puzzle and the answer suddenly came to you. You can see it, Jade is going to go into one of her moods again. You need to snap her out of it.

you type a short message to Dave that sounds an awful lot like 'sorry but i have not really been paying much attention so now i am ditching you for Jade' but in much nicer and complex vocabulary before messaging your other close friend. She is nearly always online seeing as how she owns at least three different computers.

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG]

TT: Hello Jade.  
GG: hi rose!  
GG: how are you??  
TT: I was about to ask you the same question.  
GG: im doing fine!  
GG: grandpa isnt home though  
GG: so i guess its a little lonely :(  
GG: but i wont be since youre here to talk to me!!!! :)

A smile plays on your lips until you let it show itself. Despite your own problems you are glad to be able to offer Jade this one joy. You know how she sometimes gets and it is nice to be of help.

Deep down you may be destructive, a time bomb waiting for a reason to ignite, but you still somehow find it in your heart to care for your friends. Sometimes they are the only people who are even worth your time.

-

Next Chapter ====> Rose: Be Jade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thanks for reading and if you want you can check out my tumblr (ClockworkArithmetic). It's just a lot of random shit but I might eventually start using it to announce updates, also I draw sometimes and post that shit so yeah. Might be interesting.
> 
> clockworkarithmetic.tumblr.com
> 
> -Headphone Archeologist


	4. Prologue: Jade Introduce Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jade Harley is Fourteen years old and has lived alone mot of her life with no one but her Grandpa and loyal companion Becquerel. That was a while ago and even after moving to the city where she has friends like Dave and Rose, deep down beneath the smile Jade Harley is still so so lonely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last part to the prologue. Shit is about to get real.

Your name is Jade Harley

You are Fourteen years old.

And you have got to be the loneliest person on the planet. 

Which is totally weird because you have the bestest friends on the planet Dave and Rose! They are so great to you! You live in the city now, surrounded by people all the time, there is no reason what so ever for you to be this lonely. Even when you lived all alone on that island with no one but your Grandpa and Bec you were not this sad. Sure you were at least a little sad but not like this! Ever since you left you just feel more and more isolated.

It doesn't make sense.

Dave and Rose are the greatest friends ever. When Grandpa isn't around (which is practically always) one of them (usually Rose) is online to cheer you up! Still sometimes you just get really sad, you try to smile and be happy so no one will worry but you think sometimes it doesn't work. Whenever you are around your friends you laugh and smile and have a great time even when deep down you feel so far away.

You have no reason to feel this way; and as someone with an intimate understanding of space you know you are no further from them then you were yesterday but ti feels like miles anyway.

****==== > Jade: Find Your Missing Pumpkins****

Well you could if you were not already looking. Seriously where could they have gone?

You have never stopped thanking your grandpa for the addition of the greenhouse in your backyard where you grow all sorts of plants and vegetables. It is where you go when you get really lonely or your grandpa is out which is pretty much always so you spend a lot of time in here. Yet even after all this time and all the days spent in the greenhouse you still can never figure out why your pumpkins go missing!

A loud and annoyed sigh escapes your lips as you check beneath the flower beds for the fourth time. Where could that blasted gourd have gone to! Could it have possibly gotten up and walked away? No that's silly! Maybe a witch used a spell to give it legs so it could run away! Or maybe a burglar came in at night and stole it! That's stupid why would a burglar want a pumpkin? Besides you slept in the greenhouse last ight! You would have noticed if someone came in.

You are getting way off track! Jade Focus!

Barking fills your ears (effectively snapping you out of your imagination which seems to run away with you far too often) as Bec bounds towards you happily. You move just in time to catch his huge paws on your arm as he jumps up to lick your face. You laugh and pet his fluffy white head. Maybe Bec could help you find your pumpkins?

Smiling you hold his fluffy head in both of your hands, after transferring his paws to your shoulders. (He's a big boy so he pretty much is your height when he stands up like this, not that you are overly tall but oh never mind.) "Bec do you know where my pumpkins are?" You ask sweetly, showing off your buck teeth in a smile.

He barks and licks your face again before jumping down onto all four feet. He runs outside barking all the while. You don't know if he means for you to follow him or if he's just being playful. It's a tough decision but you decide to follow him to whatever nefarious villain stole your pumpkins! "Bec wait up a sec!" you yell, trying to go after him when your phone pings from the row of beds where you set it down. 

Curiously you pick it up and scan the text. Of course it would be Dave. You decide for Dave pumpkin thieves can wait.

TG: sup harley  
GG: hi dave!  
GG: im just spending time with the flowers!  
TG: flowers  
TG: harley you need real friends  
GG: hey i have you and rose dont i????  
TG: exactly my point  
TG: your best friends name is rose  
TG: shes a flower dude  
TG: so she doesn't count

You smile fondly down at your phone because Dave has always been your friend and you know no matter what he says he's really just saying 'I'm glad you're my friend harley' with a smiley emote at the end. You've been getting sort of depressed lately because grandpa has been gone more often then ever and it's summer vacation so not even school has been around to distract you. Of course Rose and Dave being the sweethearts they are have taken turns to pester you every couple hours or so, to keep your spirits up.

You love your friends so much. You just sort of wish they didn't have to go trough the trouble. You don't want to be a burden, you just want to be happy.

GG: well that still leaves you as my friend!  
GG: and youre cool enough to count for like five real friends!  
TG: more like a million  
GG: exactly!  
GG: So i in fact have a million friends  
GG: i think maybe its you who needs more friends cool kid! : )  
TG: are you kidding me harley  
TG: i have bitches all over me  
GG: i thought we were talking about friends?  
TG: whatever you and Rose are the only friends i need

Bec barks from somewhere nearby and when you look up he has something distinctly orange and vegetable in nature at his feet. It takes you all of three seconds to realize that its one of your missing pumpkins. Scrambling to get a hold of your phone again you say a quick goodbye to Dave before forcing the device in your jeans pocket and running after Bec who picks up the piece of pumpkin and runs off as well. 

"Bec stop! Where did you even get that!" You yell after him "BEC!"

****

**==== > Jade: Remember**

When you were young you and your grandpa used to live on an island. No one else lived there so you and your grandfather had the entire jungle land to yourselves. You are not sure if it is, psychology is more of Rose's thing, but you think it might have been that which made you so lonely now.

You remember a young six year old Jade, just a sweet little girl who tried to be nice to everyone. Before you lived on the island you remember that other kids in your neighborhood used to make fun of her quite often, that they would laugh at her teeth or big round glasses. They would pull her hair which always looked like she had just woken up no matter how hard Little Jade tried to tame the dreadful locks. You remember they used to push her sometimes and all the sweet little girl wanted was to go away forever. 

When she came home one day with scrapes on her knees and elbows and a cut along her forehead, still crying and muddy your Grandpa held Little Jade close and she told him she wanted to leave.

That is how six year old Jade ended up on that island. 

You never told Rose or Dave why you moved away, they didn't know that the other kids picked on you. You just never told them becuase they would only worry, but when they found out little Jade was leaving they made her promise to call every day and log onto pesterchum and pester them all the time. Dave even cried a little which he firmly denies today

Despite being the only ones on that island Grandpa was still very busy all the time, and Little Jade's house was very big so she could hardly ever find her grandpa let alone play with him. She usually ended up in the yard, talking to the plants or caring for the sickly flowers and trying to get them to grow. She had an impressive garden in the backyard by the time she was seven.

Little Jade was always told by her grandpa not to go into the trees, even if she knew how to shoot a rifle it was dangerous so she always tried to stay away from the thicker parts of the jungle. Until one day she decided she wanted to go on an adventure like her Grandpa used to go one when he was younger. Jade wore her standard ankle length skirt, a white shirt and a backpack stuffed with food, water and a bunch of other stuff she thought she might need.

Grabbing her grandpa's rifle Little Jade made her way out into the dense trees.

For a while it was great, she saw so many different animals and plants. She even gathered a few seeds so she could plant them closer to home. Jade stayed out there for hours, wandering deeper and deeper into the jungle. When it started to get dark she knew well enough to head home but the problem was she had no idea which direction to head for.

Jade got lost that day.

She tried desperately to remember what direction to go, she even tried following her footsteps but as the sun sank lower and lower it became harder and harder to see. Eventually she gave up and sat down at the base of a tree and started crying. She was never going to find her way home and it was all her fault! She should have listened, she should have never asked her Grandpa to come to this place!

You cannot remember how long Little Jade sat there, but eventually she heard a noise, a low growl which made her grab her gun and point it shakily at the darkness in the direction she heard the noise. 

Moments later a large white, dog thing jumped out of the bushes. Jade screamed, accidentally firing the gun but missing by a mile. The dog or whatever it was whimpered and pounced on little Jade. She squealed but all the dog did is lick her face. The licking continued and Jade started to laugh. When she eventually got the big loveable beast off her she smiled as it curled up half on half off her lap.

"Are you lost too little guy?" she asked, running her hands through his thick white fur. He made a content noise so she repeated the action. "I wish i knew which way home was..." she mumbled.

The two of them sat there for a long time, Little Jade having a one way conversation with the big white dog she was now calling Bec. "Hey Bec" she asked as the sun started to come up. "Will you be my friend?"

Little Jade waited until the sun was fully in the sky before she started walking again, eventually finding her way home with Bec's help. (You still don't know how he knew the way but he was the one who guided you out of that forest that day.) When she got home her grandpa was coming out of the house looking panicked but when he saw Little Jade his expression turned to one of relief and he rushed forward and hugged her tight. 

"Grandpa, grandpa this is Bec! Bec's my new friend can he stay here with us!?" Jade asked excitedly from her place buried in her Grandfathers chest. 

Grandpa Harley laughed and hugged his granddaughter closer. He laughed through his tears because when he had woken up to find Jade missing he was in such a panic and here she is safe and sound asking about a dog. "Of course any friend of yours is a friend of mine Jade!" He said happily.

Little Jade wormed her way out of her grandfathers embrace and hugged bec. "You hear that bec!? You get to stay with us!" 

It wasn't long after that you asked Grandpa to take you back home. You missed Rose and Dave and wanted to be a part of the world again. Bec came with you of course and he has been the most loyal friend you have ever had. Dave and Rose were so glad to have you back, and even if the kids still picked on you, you tried not to let it bother you at least until you were alone.

****

**==== > Jade: Stop Thinking About Things That Are Depressing.**

That's a good idea. You don't want to be reminded of those things! You want to be happy! Why can't you ever just be happy? Some thought always has to just drag you down. It's probably why you always act so happy, maybe if you pretend enough it'll be true. You sigh.

This isn't working out so well.

Trying to ward off bad thoughts you pull out your phone and send Rose a message.

GG: rose are you free to talk????  
GG: my head is starting to go to dark places again :(  
TT: Say no more dear.  
TT: Do you want to talk about it?

You love your friends so much.

So why are you still so goddamn sad?

\--

Next Chapter ====> John: Get On With This Fucking Story Already!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of Prologue Part 4.  
> http://clockworkarithmetic.tumblr.com/
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for reading guys.  
> \- Headphone Archeologist


	5. John: Escape - Dave: GTFO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cast: John, Dave, Jade, Rose (pesterchum)
> 
> Excerpt: You blink a few times. Birds are chirping, singing softly and the breeze is cool and gentle on your skin. When you look down you see your feet dangling in midair with the trees and grass far, far below. A wide lazy smile slowly manages to show itself on your face before you are laughing. Half in fear, half in awe because holy shit you actually did it! Fuck this is amazing!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The First pesterlog is two weeks after John's Prologue, the rest of the chapter is three years in the future just so ya'll know.
> 
> Also you should know I posted this chapter a day earlier on my tumblr ;) only a few changes were made from that version.

\-- show pesterlog --

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB]

TG: hey egbert  
TG: come on  
TG: talk to me  
TG: cool kid to dork cool kid to dork come in please  
TG: dude seriously  
TG: its been like two weeks now  
TG: what did i do  
TG: dont tell me you are mad at me for something  
TG: i know i am an ass sometimes but you are kind of my best friend  
TG: if i did something tell me so i can fix it  
TG: please  
TG: john  
TG: john come on  
TG: fuck this

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pesteringectoBiologist [EB]

**==== > John: Get This Story Started Already**

Your name is John Egbert and you are sixteen years old now.

It seems like your life has taken a huge gap between the years thirteen and sixteen like those three years meant nothing simply because nothing interesting happened. You weren't a character being introduced and you weren't an adolescent about to take a large step in his life. Your sure if someone read the story of your life those three years would be incredibly boring to read. Not that your life is particularly interesting anyway.

But this isn't a story, you are not the rugged hero about to meet his daughter for the first time. This is your life and a lot has happened in those three years.

Looking down at your PDA you have a single contact highlighted; turntechGodhead. Dave Strider. You haven't talked to him since you were thirteen and you don't know how he would react if you suddenly tried to bring him back into your life. But seeing where you are now, you just might have to. 

You have realized a lot since you were merely thirteen, you realized that you have wasted completely WASTED your whole life in this one building knowing deep down that an entire world exists out there. There is so much to see and so much to learn and you WANT more than anything you _want_ to go out there and you want to experience it all. 

Shakily you stand on the very ledge of the tallest window you could find. The ground looks so far down its frightening but you wanted to have some room just in case. After all, you've never lifted something close to a human body with the wind before. Sure sometimes you would levitate yourself a few feet from the floor but this was different. This was you and hundreds of fatal feet from the ground with nothing but the wind to keep you from literally killing yourself. 

You suppose it might be better than wasting away in here to slowly go insane from lack of communication with people who are not your dad. After giving up contact with Dave you have been going a little insane and that might be why you are about to throw yourself from the highest story of this incredibly large tower you call home.

Deep breaths John, you can do this.

Before jumping and possibly plummeting to your death you open a chat with turntechGodhead and you send him a simple message.

ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

EB: help

You don't wait for a reply, you feel like if you wait anymore you will loose your nerve so with one last deep breath you lean forward and begin to fall.

Its an odd sensation, free falling. Its like being weightless, the rush of the wind in your ears and around you keeps you from hearing or opening your eyes against it. There is an adrenaline rush of knowing there is nothing but wind between you and a painful sudden death. Of course the wind is your element and you make good use of it.

After the first few moments of sudden shock are over you start to command the wind, compelling it to catch you before the inevitable fall that comes from jumping. The wind is a friend to you and you can feel the breeze pick up and begin to swirl around you at your silent commands. Eventually you stop falling and the deafening sound that was once around you stops all at once. Slowly you open your eyes and you are not falling anymore, you're just floating and everything is calm around you.

Its almost a shock when you think of the chaos that was there just a few seconds ago. 

You blink a few times. Birds are chirping, singing softly and the breeze is cool and gentle on your skin. When you look down you see your feet dangling in midair with the trees and grass far, far below. A wide lazy smile slowly manages to show itself on your face before you are laughing. Half in fear, half in awe because holy shit you actually did it! Fuck this is amazing!

Tentatively you try to move yourself forward and before you know it, you are rocketing yourself across the sky, laughing in disbelief. You do a few loops and spirals toward the earth until you feel sick and dizzy with this new sense of freedom. You soar upward until you are above the clouds, white and fluffy in all their majesty, looking as if you could just lay on them. 

You yell simply because you have never felt so free.

your heart is pounding in your chest and you are overcome with a jittery energy, you want to do everything, go everywhere, see anything you WANT everything and YOU WANT IT NOW!

A breeze blows a particularly fluffy cloud beneath you and it looks so soft that you decided you are going to drop onto it and see what clouds feel like. You never ever thought you would ever know until now. 

When you fall straight through and end up wet for your trouble you realize your mistake. Of course this does not damper your mood, it only heightens it.

In this elated state you are very surprised when your PDA makes a sudden noise. You scramble to grab it out of your pocket but the device slips from your hands and starts its decent downward. You give chase but you cant seem to grab it in time before it meets an untimely end at the hands of the ground. 

It is shattered beyond repair, little circuit boards chipped and cracked laying scattered around the broken case. It's sort of poetically depressing.

You frown when you realize you could have just had the wind grab it for you. You smack yourself for such stupidity. 

The bundle of unwound energy inside you has calmed somewhat so now you can actually think about what you are going to do now. Your plan was to run away but you are not sure where to go. You could always go back but you don't think you are ever going to be able to live on the ground or inside anything every again. The sky is your home now. You don't want to risk being grounded again.

So you stick to your original plan, you are certain you will find someplace to settle in. 

Carefully you ascend once again into the sky and just fly around for a while. Everything is so amazing from up here you never want to land.

\-- show pesterlog -- 

ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

EB: help  
TG: whoa egbert long time no see  
TG: finally decided to stop ignoring me

ectoBiologist [EB] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [TG] 

TG: dude what the fuck  
TG: you cant just walk away like that after three years of silence  
TG: fuck

turntechGodhead [TG] ceases pestering ectoBiologist [EB] 

**==== > John: Be Dave**

You are now Dave Strider and you are now sixteen years old. It's been three years since you last spoke to your best friend, and you would say you were surprised when he sent you that message if Rose had not already told you it was going to happen like a million years ago. Shocker. 

Of course besides telling you that he would message you she didn't say anything else so you were a bit surprised by the sudden plea for help. Sort of. 

Cue one Dave Strider making a mad dash to save his best friend. You may be a cool kid but you care a lot about your friends and you are in no way ashamed of that. Even if Egbert did cut you out for three fucking years, he's still your friend and even if Rose won't tell you why you know he must have had a good reason; otherwise he wouldn't have come to you all this time later.

Which finds you where you are now. After receiving the message you have been waiting for all day Rose instructed you to get your skater ass on your board and GTFO. You are not sure where you are going however, mostly you're just following the road and going straight until someone tells you otherwise. 

Speaking of Rose.

TG: okay seriously rose he already sent the message  
TG: now what  
TT: Alright, go ahead and reply to John's message.  
TT: He will not answer you back but reply anyway.  
TT: You need to get downtown, no rush just get there.  
TG: sure thing

A woman ahead of you has to practically dive out of your way your moving so fast (it also might have had something to do with you not paying attention, oops) and starts shouting about damned kids and their skateboards but you are already long gone. Rose told you not to rush but there is no suspense in a brisk walk. You will never claim to be a patient person; and maybe you are worried abut John. A little, okay a lot you are seriously worried about him and no one is giving you answers. 

You feel like rushing is a given in this situation.

So you send a quick reply and while Rose did say he wouldn't reply you did not expect him to suddenly go offline like that. You might be overreacting but a million different possible reasons flow through your mind and all of them are ludicrous but none the less make you quicken your pace just a little.

Rose starts pestering you again.

TT: Okay stop.  
TT: Do you see that tall building with all the windows?  
TG: yeah i see it so what  
TT: You need to be on the roof.  
TG: are you shitting me  
TG: how am i supposed to get up there  
TT: Are you seriously asking me this question?

Rolling your eyes you run inside the building and flash step to the stairwell before anyone can see or try and stop you. Within seconds you are climbing, taking the stairs two at a time. You are not sure how many steps there are exactly but you also don't exactly care.

You keep running. 

It feels like forever and a half until you burst through the doors onto the roof, even if you flash stepped the last few floors. Once you are up there you have a message typed out to rose (TG: now what) but of course she is two steps ahead and has already replied to your unasked question. 

TT: Face the north side of the building.  
TT: Now tell me.  
TT: Can you see the roof to the next building over?  
TG: yeah  
TT: Excellent.  
TT: Back up until you are as far from the ledge without any obstacles in the way.  
TT: Be absolutely sure you are still facing the northern ledge.  
TG: okay done now what  
TT: Now my dear Strider, we have to wait.  
TG: fuck really  
TT: Yes.  
TT: I have done all I can for the time being.  
TT: The rest is up to you Strider.  
TT: Do not fuck up.  
TG: sure thing

You take a deep breath and pocket your phone. Rose didn’t say whether or not you could sit down, so you don’t. You just stay where you are and watch curiously as a few helicopters make themselves present in the sky. 

**==== > Dave: Be John Again**

You don't know how long you have been flying but subconsciously you have started to head in the direction of the lights you sometimes see in the distance. Your logic is this; lights = buildings and buildings = people so lights = good. This is of course assuming that people are friendly you don't actually know for sure but hey Dave was pretty nice to you so you are whiling to bet you can find someone good people there. Or wherever and besides if there are not you can always just fly off somewhere else.

Flying is great.

When you start to approach the buildings you fly lower until you are maybe ten feet above the tallest buildings. You made your way here but now you don't know exactly what you should do. Right now you are in awe of everything, it's loud even all the way up here and everything seems to be moving. You can hardly even comprehend what you are seeing but it brings a smile to your face none the less. Everything is shiny, metallic and simply buzzing with life. You knew it was a lie, you KNEW people were out here you knew it. Your thoughts are interrupted when you see a black smudge in the distance approaching you.

You may have lived in a tower your entire life but you have been on the internet and you've read a few books but you still have never seen a helicopter in real life before, well of course not until now. You sort of stare at it in awe until two others join the first and you realize they are coming toward you.

Wow those are some ominous helicopters. Instead of doing something smart like ducking out of the way (it never occurs to you that normal kids might not fly but who could blame you, you've never even MET any other kids) so all you really do is float dumbly until you see the light reflect off of something metallic; however before you can react something crashes into you and a loud noise fills the air. Something fast passes over your head but you and whatever crashed into you are rapidly falling. A roof is coming at you fast so you use a rush of air to cushion the blow as much as you can but it still hurts.

"Fuck..." you mutter as you sit up, you lift your hand to block out the sun and see a boy standing in front of you. He has a pair of strange looking sunglasses that are triangular? His hair is blond and short and he is saying something to you but your head is pounding from the impact and you really cant hear him until your head clears.

He must have been the thing that collided with you. But how? you were up so high! What did he do jump off another roof to catch you and take yu down with him? Why would he even do something like that?

"-ohn? John! Come on dude we have to go!" without waiting for an answer Blondie grabs your arm, pulls you up to your feet and starts running, half dragging you along with him. You yelp when more loud bangs sound and you can see little bits of dust lift off the roof when whatever small thing that was just propelled through the air hits the ground.

"What is that!? you yell over the pounding in your head and the noise outside. Adrenaline is pumping through your blood and you don't even question who this guy is, why he is helping you or how he knows your name. You figure there will be time for such questions later, besides you don't see any reason not to trust him.

"Guns, look ask questions later run now!"

You and Blondie are about to burst through the roof entrance when a loud female voice calls out "Dave over here!" Your guide turns and you see a dark haired green eyed girl gesturing for Blondie (Dave? Like your Dave?) to come over. Your both running when more noise fills the air and when you reach the girl all at once everything is quiet and still. 

In the time span of a single blink you went from on top a roof to a small cluttered bedroom. You blink a few times, vaguely aware of the Dark haired girl and Dave talking next to you.

"Thanks Jade."

"No problem cool kid."

"What were you doing there anyway?"

"Rose told me that I should go to that exact spot at that time, I didn't know why until I saw you guys by the way who is he-"

You aren't sure how but somehow you end up flat on your back staring at the ceiling. You are sore all over and you have no idea what is happening. Both Dave and the girl, Jade are looking down at you from above. The girl said his name was Dave and she called him a cool kid. You remember Dave telling you a few things about himself like how his favorite color is red and he wears shades exactly like his brothers. Without the thrill of a narrow escape clouding your mind; the veils lifts and you see Dave your childhood friend your BEST friend standing above you looking concerned. "Dave?" you ask slowly in disbelief because you can hardly believe its really him. You never thought you would meet him and yet here you are.

He smiles a small smile that's almost a smirk but its too soft at the edges. "Hey John" he offers you a hand and in that moment you just know that this is your Dave, the Dave you have been friends with for years and haven't talked to in three. Your eyes are burning with tears and when you take his hand and he hauls you up you use the momentum and fall into him, wrapping him in a tight hug. He almost falls over with the impact but he manages to stays standing. You hear that Jade girl say something along the lines of "awwww so cute!" but all you are aware of is the warmth of your best friend, he smells sort of like sand, of deserts and heat. When his arms wrap around you in turn you hold him tighter because you can't believe you went three years without talking to him. 

How could you ever have cut Dave out like that!?

"You really came to help me... You really did... Thank you" Your voice is muffled by his white shirt but you don't care, you think he heard you if the way he shakes with laughter is any indicator. You didn't realize how much taller he was than you until he rests his chin on the top of your head and whispers back.

"Of course I did, you're my best bro."

Its so much better to hear him in real life than it ever was online. 

**==== > Bonus Pesterlog!**

\-- Show Pesterlog --

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

TT: Nice catch Dave.

\--

**==== > Next Chapter - Dave: Flip Your Shit Because Holy Fuck John Is Really Here Like IRL For Real**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading
> 
> If any of you guys want a little insight into the mind of one Headphone Archeologist check out my tumblr you know shameless self promotion and all.  
> Thanks again guys really.
> 
> http://clockworkarithmetic.tumblr.com/
> 
> \- Headphone Archeologist


	6. Dave: Process and Find a Home for This Adorable Dork

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cast: Dave, John, Jade, Rose, Jane Crocker (Nanna)
> 
> Excerpt: "Nanna?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again everyone! So i started school yesterday and it sucks but I am also really happy because I love my school and things are great. 
> 
> Anyway leave some comments and tell me what you think about the latest chapter! Hope you enjoy!

**==== > Dave: Flip Your Shit Because Holy Fuck John Is Really Here Like IRL For Real**

You know, if Rose had told you why she set you up on that rooftop in the first place you would have found another way to save your best friend because holy fuck what was she thinking!?

On the other hand Holy fuck John is really here in the same room as you. Who would have thought we was this close the entire time. Where has the little dork been hiding anyway? how could you have never seen him until now if he was in the city the whole time? He seems like the sort of kid to stick out, the kind that had a bunch of friends because he was happy and people just gravitated toward him or the sort that got bullied for being so small and smiley. 

Lets face it, John was pretty short, shorter than you thought he would be anyway. He had a slight overbite and a bright smile; blue eyes straight from an anime and raven locks that seemed to defy gravity. He looked liked a happy go lucky kid who lived a completely sheltered life and didn't know anything bad ever. This either made people want to protect them or take advantage of them.

So basically you're point is John seems like the sort of kid you would have heard about, or at least seen at one point.The city isn't that big and you've known him for years.

Or you might still be sort of flipping out; you can't really tell. Your brain is sort of whirlwinding (that's not a word but it's a word now you are making it a word) right now so bare with it and your regularly scheduled Dave programing will be returned shortly. 

Okay so rooftop lets start there. 

When you were on that roof you really didn't know what you you were looking for until you saw a blue blob flying over the city; which turned out to be John. You'd say you were surprised but you aren't, sure you suspected John was different like you Jade and Rose but you never knew what his power was. Flying suits him somehow which might have been what made you so certain it was John. Actually it was probably because Rose set you up here to save John and this was way to coincidental to be anyone else.

Seriously who else could it have been?

You wanted to yell at John because fuck people like you didn't just do that! Where had he been this whole time if I didn't even know the basic rules? When you saw the helicopters you just knew metaphorical shit was about to hit the metaphorical fan so you jumped. You might not have been thinking very clearly when you did it but you jumped grabbed that kid and hit the ground hard. Or rather the other rooftop, suddenly everything Rose said makes sense.

Honestly you thought it would hurt more but just before you landed a rush of air seemed to cushion to blow some. You didn't bother thinking about it then but you can think about it now. It might have been John using some of his voodoo magic, maybe flying isn't the only ace up his sleeve.

Anyway, you never thought you would be so relieved to see Jade and space portals. Those things feel weird as hell. Anything to get you out of that situation as fast as possible however is good in your opinion. 

Which finds you where you are now. With John wrapped around you tighter than trying to fit into a small kids sleeping bag. He doesn't seem keen on letting you go soon so you just, hug him back and rest your chin on the top of his head. You would be mad that he thought you were just going to leave him hanging but you are far too happy he is even HERE to care right now.

Worries and problems can come after your epic bromantic reunion and long drawn out hugs in this case are ironic as fuck. Not that you care much for that anymore.

A distinct feminine "awwww" comes from Jade. You slip her the bird and make a point to nuzzle into John's dark hair some. He's really warm and small in your arms and you kinda just want to hold him forever which is a strange and very new feeling. You don't dwell on it much, he's your friend and you just want to keep him safe.

John untangles himself from your embrace moments later but never leaves the circle of your arms so you just leave them loosely draped around his waist. He looks a bit red in the face but he is smiling none the less. You hate to kill his happy mood right now but the moment is over and you need some answers. You need them now so you can figure out what your next steps are. Rose never told you what to do after you caught him so you have to take the lead here. 

Ugh.

"John where the fuck were you the past three years?"

His reaction is immediate, his smile drops and his arms fall from around you, so you let him go in turn and tuck your hands in your pockets. Johns blue eyes dodge your shaded gaze and he is biting his bottom lip with his over sized front teeth. Finally he looks up at you again and says slowly "can we sit down?"

**==== >**

You end up sitting shoulder to shoulder with john on the floor at the foot of Jade's bed. Jade herself is sprawled on top of the mattress so that she can look down at the both of you but you pretend she isn't there and instead focus on john who suddenly looks very unsure. He's biting his lip again and it is all so very John that you can't find anything wrong with the picture.

"Okay..." John takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. He nods to himself as if affirming something and starts again "Okay so... you know how when I used to talk to you I sometimes had to go suddenly? Like out of the blue?"

What does that have to do with anything? Instead of saying it aloud you merely nod and motion for him to continue. 

"That was because my dad didn't like me being on the internet; or going outside. This is the first time I've left my house for as long as I can remember." Before you can even process what he just said Jade is interrupting you.

"So wait, you've never left you're house!? That's Insane!"

John looks startled and stares at her wide eyed, like a dear in the headlights and you chuckle lightly before gesturing at the girl above you. "John this is Jade Harley, she's a close friend of mine. Jade, this is John Egbert and now that you have been introduced no more interruptions."

"but-"

"Shhhhhhhh"

"Dave" she whines.

"shhhhhhhhhh"

Jade huffs but doesn't say anything else.

John laughs sort of breathlessly and swallows once before starting his story again. "I was always told it was normal for people to be inside all day, that I was perfectly normal. It wasn't insane to me, at least not for the longest time; but then I started to talk to you more and as I got older it started making less and less sense. I mean where was dad getting all the food from? Why did he disappear from time to time? Why could I hear people outside sometimes? Nothing made sense but I didn't want to believe my dad lied to me. I stopped talking to you because I thought if I did maybe I could still live in the lie..." John is biting his lip again, this time looking like he is holding something back. He goes on anyway. "I messaged you today because I didn't know who else to turn to, I've lived inside my whole life, you are the first person I talked to beside my dad! I didn't know where to go or who to turn to..."

John finally meets your shades and his blue eyes are glassy with tears and wide with fear and confusion. "I just ran away from home Dave."

**==== > Dave: Process Everything You Just Heard**

Well despite the strangeness of his explanation it makes a lot of sense and explains many odd thins about John. Like how John didn’t know any movie titles you had ever thrown at him, like how he avoided topics like being outside or meeting people like the plague; like how he seemed to have no idea how to talk to people or behave. Like how he thought he could just fly around the city without consequences. 

So John ran away from home, and he's here now. Well you for sure are not going to let him go back home where his dad can trap him again. But then where are you going to stash him? Where is going to stay? Can he even survive here when he has never been outside before today? Fuck you have no idea, but John is your friend and you are not letting him go back to a place where he was trapped with no hope of escape.

Before you can begin a reply, Jade has thrown herself off the bed and into John, hugging him tightly. Her eyes are a bit glassy from tears and she is speaking so fast you can hardly understand her. "Oh my god John I'm so sorry that happened to you! We won't let you get taken away will we Dave? We'll take care of you I promise! Everything is going to be okay now. We can integrate you into society and you can come to school with us and we'll have loads of fun, I'll take you all over the city but you can't fly anymore, it's bad alright? Oh I wish I could go back in time and hit your dad before he ever did that to you!"

"Jade, breath!" You remind her before she passes out or dies from asphyxiation. 

She pauses and takes a deep breath. "Thanks Dave." 

"Don't mention it, now could you release my best bro there before he suffocates?"

As if just realizing she was still holding onto John, Jade gasped out a startled "Oh!" and lets him go, the first thing John does is take a deep breath, lets it out slowly and smile sheepishly at Jade. He moves a bit closer to you as Jade makes herself comfortable on the floor. He smiles at you and you smirk down at him in a way you hope is reassuring. Suddenly Jade clapping her hands together draws both yours and Johns attention. 

"Okay! I think John should go with Dave for the time being you can crash at his place, I'll go talk to Rose and Dave you should explain some things to John so he doesn't get in trouble alright?" 

You nod but John looks confused. "Is it far?"

Jade giggles and smiles at John "Oh don't worry I know a short cut!"

Of course she does, you smirk a bit because lets face it, Jade knows space like you know time. She can bend and change space like you can speed up and alter time. After getting to her feet and helping you and John up she gestures to her door and says; "just go through there" before flopping back down on her bed and picking up her phone.

John still looks confused but he won't be for long. You grab his wrist and lead him to the door, when you open it you feel a crackle of energy at your fingertips. On the other side is your bedroom, messy as usual and very familiar. Crossing the threshold causes a small spark of energy to run through you but you are used to it, John on the other hand flinches and stares confused at the door as you shut it behind you. Immediately he opens the door again but this time it just leads out into a hall littered with smuppets. Goddammit Bro.

Slowly John turns to you. "How did she do that?"

"The same way you fly John, just a different medium." You shut the door and move to sit against the headboard of your bed. "Jade can bend space, she just linked my bedroom to hers and when we were both across she destroyed the link. Simple."

John settles on your bed in front of you and lets out an awed little "wow" Then he looks up at you with his bright blue eyes so full of sheltered innocence. "What can you do?"

"I bend time, I can speed it up, slow it down, fast forward, rewind, anything really. Although I try to avoid moving through time because it's just a giant hassle and Rose has warned me about it a zillion times. So I mostly stick to altering the speed and not the flow."

"Who's Rose?"

Right you probably should have mentioned that before. "She's my friend, she was the one who sent me to get you. Rose can see the future so she told me exactly where to go and when, didn't tell me what I was supposed to do there but you know it worked out okay. She sort of does that a lot, leaves you little clues and crumbs that leave you starving for the rest but she never gives anymore than that. Shit is annoying as fuck."

John nods, looking thoughtful. You don't really blame him he probably has a million questions. Finally he asks "who were the people in the helicopters?"

You shrugs because you don't know exactly. None of you ever have, you just know you are supposed to stay away from them. "The government? I dunno, see they don't really like people like us using our abilities in public like that. Everyone knows, but no one talks about it and if we do well that happens. We get killed, or nearly killed."

"Not everyone can do the things we can?"

A small laugh escapes you at how confused and surprised he sounds. He really did think he was normal. "Hell no, as far as we are aware, only me you Rose and Jade have these abilities and like I said they know about us but as long as we never use our abilities no one cares. Of course sometimes we use them anyway like Jade did but it's very dangerous so we try not to. Our guardians also know, they protect us. My Bro is the one who explained this shit to me when I was little. Other than that no one else knows who we are, people in general know about us but not who we are so we get to live relatively normal lives."

John has a look on his face like he is in deep concentration, trying to process everything and let it sink in. He nods but you don't think he really gets it, he will soon though if he stays here. 

Silence stretches for a while until you decide to ask a question of your own. "So what can you do? Is it just the flying thing or is it more?"

He shrugs "It's not really flying actually, I can like, control the wind? I just made it carry me. That's how I fly anyway." he smiles shyly and ads "I actually didn't know if it would carry me, I've never flown before today."

You smile fondly. "Wind huh? Suits you."

John laughs but his expression turns grim quickly. "I'm so sorry I stopped talking to you Dave I was just really scared and I was trying so hard to believe my dad and I knew I couldn't if I kept on talking to you. T-then I just didn't know how you would r-react to me a-after I had not talked to you in so long and- and I was scared you would hate me."

Before he can say anything else you grab his shirt and force him forward into another hug. "Shut up John, I understand okay? It's fine, you're here now and we- I'm going to take care of you." He nods against your chest and you both stay like that, silently rubbing circles into his shoulder blades with your thumb until a knock sounds at your door. Not your bedroom door but the front door.

John jumps and looks up at you, you shrug and untangle yourself from him and go to answer it. You should not have been so surprised to see Rose. "Hello David."

"Lalonde, so I am to assume Jade explained the situation?"

She smiles softly "There was not much need, I merely waited to give you two privacy."

You will deny it forever, you so did not blush. "Stop peeping on my future and get your own life."

Rose laughs in that dainty way that she does. After a moment she gestures behind you and asks. "So this is John?"

Sure enough when you look over your shoulder John is standing behind you. Strange you had not heard him approach you and you are a Strider so that really means something. You turn back toward Rose and scoff. "As if you didn't already know."

Ignoring you Rose pushes her way into the apartment and offers her hand to John. "I am Rose Lalonde, I'm sure Dave has already told you a little about me. No doubt only good things." The wicked smile she flashes you confirms that she already knows everything you told him. Nervously John shakes her hand and nods as if he is unsure what else to do. His reaction is justified, this is after all only the third person he has ever met in the world and it must be overwhelming all in one day. The same day he ran from home.

Fuck.

"So what are you doing here Lalonde" you say to try and save John from her piercing eyes and psychoanalysis. "Here to tell us more stories of the future that offer no help or answers?"

"Not this time Strider, no, I am actually here to introduce someone to John."

Okay so you're confused now, Rose looks over her shoulder just as a nice old women that you know as Jane Crocker makes her way into view. At first you are confused. Why would Rose bring Jane here exactly? You are about to ask Rose that very question when you catch sight of John. The little dying cat sound he made drawing your attention. He looks shocked like he saw a ghost but there is familiarity and recognition in his eyes. Rose of course is smirking like usual. She always knows what is going on and it is so not fair.

"John?" Jane asks in disbelief. 

"Nanna?"

**Next Chapter ==== > John: Fall into Place**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, please leave comments! What you liked what you didn't I would love to hear from you either way and of course if you like I'll leave my tumblr link as usual so you can visit.
> 
> http://clockworkarithmetic.tumblr.com/
> 
> -Headphone Archeologist


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